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I’ve made a grave mistake. As the undertaker, it’s my job to prepare my clients for their first event in permeant darkness. Most often, families want to present their loved ones one last time wearing something elegant. So a wedding dress or tuxedo isn’t unusual.

I’m telling you this because it’s how my mistake started. A man came in six weeks ago. He was beautiful even in his state. I was informed he had met his maker while cheating on his wife with some hot piece of ass from his office. His heart couldn’t handle the excitement, and he departed with a hard-on. A very large hard-on, to be precise. Of course, his wife was embarrassed and humiliated and requested I find a way to hide it. I sure did find a way! And that way got me pregnant!

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